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[cleverblocker]

"If someone isn't dead, dying, or on fire, think very carefully if you want to bother me. Also yes, there is a lion in my house, a real, breathing, shitting, man-eating lion. I'm not making it up. Fuck off."

Unit 1469
voice | text | action

Comments

[kablam]

[ tsukishima, your room is a fucking disaster. hinata, as the resident Disaster of karasuno is judging you for all these marbles all over the place. also, seriously, who still plays with marbles? he shoots a disdainful look at the lump of blankets in the bed. maybe he'll draw a mustache on tsukishima's face while he's here. hehe yeah that would show him.

(he has yet to figure out the marbles are a trap.)

anyway! mission: glasses. hinata starts picking his way around the marbles, taking ginger steps with his small feet and hopping every now and then to avoid them. he does a pretty good job for the most part, arms splayed out wide so that he can keep his balance, and the goal is in sight! a grin lights up hinata's face as he thinks about what he's going to do with these (maybe take a selfie wearing them??? how blind is tsukishima, hinata's going to find out) and does not, in fact, think about where he's going.

his foot lands on two marbles and hinata realizes what's coming .3 seconds before it does. ]

GUWAH! [ he goes forward, arms windmilling comically as he tries to regain his balance, then cracks his chin on the bedside table and hits the ground with a very loud thump. rip. ]

[cleverblocker]

[he's up like a shot, because WOW WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT THE LION- oh. no. he can't see anything.

fumbling for his glasses, he pushes them on and turns on the light, squinting at the black-clad form laying sprawled on his floor. the sound that woke him up had been nasty. are they dead?]

...what are you doing?

[kablam]

Wa--aaah!! [ ooh fuck OH FUCK, HE'S BUSTED

hinata jumps up, makes eye contact with tsukishima and panics. a little. and by a little i mean he panics a bunch. scrambling back up to his feet and nearly eating carpet for the second time today, he makes a furtive swipe at tsukishima's desk to grab something, god only knows what, and then goes running (by which i mean tripping and falling and trying to stay on his feet) out of the room as fast as his tiny little legs can carry him.

was that the lion growling from downstairs?

hinata freezes at the top of the stairs WHAT DOES HE DO HELP ]

[cleverblocker]

[yup that's definitely guinevere growling down there, she doesn't like being woken up.

but anyways, tsukishima moves to the end of his bed, climbing over the footboard to get to the door and avoid the marbles. he's pretty sure the guard lion is going to keep hinata from escaping completely, so he's not really in any sort of rush. he just stands there in the doorway to his room, hands on his hips and a severely unimpressed look on his face.]

Did you manage to actually get anything, or did you smack your head too hard?

[kablam]

[ oh yeah... you know now that you mention it, hinata's chin kind of hurts. still, he's not thinking about that because he's more concerned that he's going to get eaten by a lion. he backpedals, then turns around and runs back in the direction he came. ]

Guwa-a-a-a--!! [ ignoring the question (though he has what looks like a pen clutched in his hand, hinata scrambles backwards as fast as he can, ducking under his arm and inserting tsukishima between himself and the lion. and then, he. basically starts climbing his back. if they are going to die here hinata is not dying first, tsukishima makes a great human shield. ] Don't let it eat me!!

[ an actual fucking monkey child ]

[cleverblocker]

[you are SO lucky his balance is pretty good, otherwise both of you would be going down the stairs straight to the hungry lion. as it is, though, tsukishima kind of wobbles when hinata climbs onto his back, and he so did not sign up for this.]

Oh my god, she isn't going to eat you. She's just unhappy that you woke her up by causing such a commotion.

[well, hinata is already clinging to his back, so he just takes the boy with him back into his room. you have no choice in this matter, shrimpy.] If you give her a second, she'll calm down and you can leave.

i love that icon so much he looks so done

[kablam]

An unhappy lion's going to end up eating someone!!!! [ hinata will literally be clinging on for dear life because that lion is going to eat him, and you will have to shake him to get him off. sorry tsukki, i know this isn't what you signed up for today.

once he backs up into the room hinata does slide off his back though, mostly because he still needs to make his escape and now he's embarrassed, too. as he's gingerly avoiding the marbles when he steps down, something occurs to him. (finally.) ] Hey--wait! Did you put those there on purpose?!

he is SO done

[cleverblocker]

I don't think she's actually eaten anyone. Yet. [he gives hinata an appraising look.] But then again, you're small enough that maybe she'd be willing to put forth the effort.

[he's just being an asshole; he's pretty sure guinevere just exists to intimidate, not actually attack people.] Of course I did, stupid. I got the list for today and figured either you or the King would be trying to break into my room, so I wanted to take preventative measures.

[exasperated sigh.] Just get over here so I can look at your chin, I want to make sure you aren't bleeding.

tsukishima "everyone around me is an idiot" kei

[kablam]

I'm fine!! [ wildly flailing his arms about to try and show how absolutely fine he is actually makes his chin kind of hurt, and hinata ends up sulkily jerking his head up to show him. there's a nasty little bruise starting to form there, but, all things considered, he's fine. ]

I can't believe you did that, you suck! I would've given it back!!

[cleverblocker]

[well, at least it's just a bruise. for a moment, he'd been afraid that hinata had bit through his tongue or something, but with the way he's carrying on, he's clearly fine. a bit of ice and he should be fine in no time. at hinata's words, he gives him the most unimpressed look he can muster.]

You. Do you even realize who you're talking to? Would I ever make this easy on you?